You Won't Relent

Surrender has always been a bit of a touchy subject for me. Humans, we don't really like vulnerability and technically speaking, it's "safer" to build up walls to stop people from getting too close to you. I think it's a very natural thing to do. Love will always be a thing of vulnerability; letting someone have your heart, loving someone means that they have a power over you, whether you like it or not.
I love God. I'll always be able to say that, always. But that love also requires certain things from me; my heart, my soul, my mind, my life, my time. Is it too much to ask? No, it's actually not but it is definitely a scary thought sometimes.

You won't relent until You
Have it all
My heart is Yours

You won't relent until You
Have it all
My heart is Yours

I'll set
You as a seal
Upon my heart
As a seal upon my arm
For there is love
That is as strong as death
Jealousy demanding as the grave
And many waters
Cannot quench this love

Come be the fire inside of me
Come be the flame upon my heart
Come be the fire inside of me
Until You and I are one

This is a song that means the world to me, you can hear it here. The first time I heard it, I was pretty floored; God wants me, all of me. I've always heard that quote, "I want more of Him, and less of me" and man, is that the truth or what. It's the only way in which my life can be complete. Nothing is more important than this.
I find myself wanting to give everything straight away but He quiets my heart and reminds me that this is something that must happen every single day, until my God and I are one.
And that's another mindblower, being one with Him, what must that feel like? Having your soul so undeniably tied to His, your heartbeat matching His, I definitely want to find out. It's times like this where I just know that God is my everything.
Yesterday, I found the verse in the Bible that this song is inspired by; Songs of Solomon 8:6 -

6 Place me like a seal over your heart,




like a seal on your arm;


for love is as strong as death,


its jealousy [a] unyielding as the grave. [b]


It burns like blazing fire,


like a mighty flame. [c]
7 Many waters cannot quench love;


rivers cannot wash it away.
If one were to give


all the wealth of his house for love,


it [d] would be utterly scorned. (NIV)

I'm pretty sure I'll never forget this part of the Bible. But then I looked up The Message translation of this verse and this is where my heart ached for God, for that need to know Him better, His word is amazing -

6-8 Hang my locket around your neck,




wear my ring on your finger.


Love is invincible facing danger and death.


Passion laughs at the terrors of hell.


The fire of love stops at nothing—


it sweeps everything before it.


Flood waters can't drown love,


torrents of rain can't put it out.


Love can't be bought, love can't be sold—


it's not to be found in the marketplace.

"The fire of love stops at nothing" - I'm pretty much amazed at this point. He won't stop, He won't soften his intensity until He has me completely wrapped up in Him. And the other part of this verse, "wear my ring on your finger" - He's openly proclaiming me as His, everyone has to know. I'm His.


My Love is mine and I am His.

The wait is on!

So...

I'm a senior prefect at my school and I'm applying for the position of head-girl, for all of you who aren't familliar with the more European ways, no, it's not just in Harry Potter :P
But it's a pretty big deal, and tomorrow, I will be told whether or not I have made it as the head-girl of my school or as the deputy head-girl, I'm pretty confident that this is in God's hands, He is the one writing my story so there's no reason at all to worry or fear, everything, well, everything is good, everything is very good...
I've just eaten a very good meal, I had a lot of time to think about my life thus far...
It's been a pretty amazing journey, I have the most amazing God, I don't even remember what I was going to do before He came into my life. So, my birth certificate and passport obviously say '94 but I believe that I was truly born in '08, that's the year when Jesus called me to Him, this is what it means to be alive.
The world has so many different, mixed-up ideas about being alive, I've tried out many of them too, and trust me when I say that none of them have ever felt this right, it's like my entire being is just agreeing with me on this...there's no doubt.
God has given me the most amazing life, He doesn't let me regret the years I spent in the darkness without Him...He doesn't let me regret choosing Him over myself, over this world, over life as we commonly know it.

"You have shown my ever wondering heart what love is, what on earth is more important than to have all of You"

Something that keeps popping up in this brain of mine is doing what is right, the problem I have is that I pretty much always know what's right but I never do it, now, this needs to change - big time!
Right decisions, they impact your life in so many amazing ways, it's not complicated, it's not difficult, it's just about doing what's right in this moment, because it'll change your life forever. I believe in taking things one day at a time, being in the present as much as I possibly can, this also means putting God first, doing what I know is right, it's not often the easiest option but it definitely is the best.
I love seeing joy in my parent's eyes when I do well, I love that look on their faces more than anything, especially my mom. And I want to do well, I have to allow myself to do well, because of Jesus, because of me.


Buh-bye now :)

My Resolve...

So...

Today is what? Sunday now...
Today was AMAZING. Seriously speaking...
The kids at church today were amazing, I love teaching them about God, I love teaching them the truth, it's not about religion, it's not about me, it's about a God who is all about people.
I loved seeing their eyes light up when I told them the reason for the rainbow...

12 And God said, "This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: 13 I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. 14 Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, 15 I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind. Never again will the waters become a flood to destroy all life. 16 Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth."
17 So God said to Noah, "This is the sign of the covenant I have established between me and all life on the earth."

But yeah, church was amazing, I love what I do to serve God and man, I wouldn't have my life any other way. I suppose that I shouldn't be too surprised at where God has brought me, surely, I knew that in one way or the other that I would be doing something like this, actively serving in God's house. It was bound to happen.
Now, when I look back, it's so obvious, God always hand His hand on me, even when I withdrew my hands from His, I would end up returning to my first Love, I would end up burning with a fiery love for Him, there was no other way for me.
OK, what else?
School tomorrow...I'm so excited...
I love school, now there was a time when I didn't think I'd be able to say that truthfully but the truth is that now, nothing could be more true.
Hahaha...


Buh-bye now
:)